Flyin' Right Along

This week we have been on a mission to get things moving! After trying to figure out what happens next and what we need to do to make things happen, yesterday we set up an appointment at the clinic where I & J live for April 18th. I need to get a hysteroscopy and a mock transfer, and then we can start meds and prepare for a transfer in the first week of June.

Last night we got tickets set up for me to fly there and back the day of my appointment. I'm so excited!

Up this week: Finishing the contract, hopefully!

God, thank you again for bringing I & J into our lives so we can help them in this way. Keep our minds, focus, and hearts on you. I pray that you would keep us all healthy this week and direct our steps as we get ready to  take this journey together. It's all for you, Amen.

Long time, no see!!

Surprise! It's an update from me!! I know, I know, I should update more... but when there is nothing going on, there's not much to update.

Now there is!

After hearing from my last IPs that they weren't continuing with surrogacy, I waited and prayed for about a week trying to decide how to go about finding another couple to work with. Then I posted an ad on the surromomsonline.com classifieds to see where that would lead me. I received a lot of e-mails from intended parents, and plenty from interested agencies, none of those went past the first few emails or conversations. One e-mail, however, was not from a couple or an agency. It was from a local infertility counselor who had a couple she wanted me to consider. I emailed her back and we talked over the phone about it and she sent each of us the other's information. It wasn't long before we were getting to know them, and decided this was the couple we wanted to work with!

I & J are from Texas (but not the Dallas area), have two children from previous surrogacies and have plenty of embryos to work with, and I'm so excited at the prospect of helping them!

Saturday was my psych eval with the infertility counselor who set us up.  Meeting her and having lunch with her was so relaxed and like talking with an old friend, I was so pleased with how it went! Now this week we will be getting everything set up with their RE and try and coordinate things between here and where they live.

Until we talk with the RE and figure out how they want to do things, we have no idea when our cycle will happen, but we are praying for May.

I would be so thankful if you could join me in praying for continued good things for this match, and also if you could pray for I & J who have gone through a lot already but have had an especially hard week this last week.

Father in Heaven, thank you so much for bringing I, J, and their precious children into my life. I pray that you would prepare the road ahead for us, light the path we tread on, and keep our hearts fixed on you as we take this journey. Thank you for the good embryos they have frozen and for their previous successful surrogacies leading the way. Comfort I & J this week in their time of heartache, give them the peace that passes all understanding, turn their mourning to dancing and their sorrow to joy. Lift their eyes toward you so they can see the one they lost is not lost at all, but waiting for them. I pray this all in your Holy Name, Jesus, Amen.

Moving forward...

A quick update, today. I got an email this week that I've been kind of sitting on and thinking about, and praying over.

J & J have decided to pursue their fertility issues a bit more and get some more testing done, and have decided to put surrogacy on hold for the moment. I am sad that we will not be moving forward, however, I do pray and hope the best for them, success, health, and happiness.

For me, this means I am searching again. This is the part of the process that seems to take forever. I do know the right couple is out there, and that there is a reason for everything. I don't know why things went this way with J & J but I have to keep the faith that God has the right couple waiting for me.

Father, thank you for the time I had getting to know J & J. Thank you for letting me be part of their lives even just for a little while, and for the part of my life that they got to be, too. I pray that they will find success in their path to parenthood, and/or peace for the road that lies ahead. For me, I pray that you would show me clearly the path I need to take in the coming months. May I seek first your Kingdom above all because it's all for you. In your Son's Precious Name, Jesus, Amen.

Negative Cycle

I apologize for not updating through the week. It's been a tough week, but I'm grateful that we were prepared for the results in the end.

I started testing on Sunday morning. I got negative after negative, with hopes that it was just too early, so I kept on. On Tuesday I let my IM know that there was no news yet but to keep hoping. Each day other girls who cycled with me and transfered on the same day would get a positive, and I knew our cycle had not worked. By Thursday it really sunk in, and I had my cry and let it out so that today I could be strong. I called IM last night and we talked and she seemed at peace about it, which was good for me to hear.

DH went to the clinic this morning with me for my blood work and then I went to to work. When I got off work I got the message left for me saying that the cycle had failed. When I came home I talked with IM who, I believe, was better for the preparation as well. I'm glad it did not blindside us.

We are being proactive and looking toward another (fresh) cycle in the next couple months, but perhaps not with the same clinic. I'm very disappointed that our cycle did not work, but God really does have a reason for everything, and I'm trusting and leaning on His understanding as much as I'm able.

Father thank you for preparing J's and my hearts for the news we got today. I pray you would comfort her and J today and keep them at peace in the knowledge that there is still hope. Thank you for bringing them into my life and for showing me the courage they have to keep going even after such news. Thank you for your perfect peace that covers us as we deal with the "why's" of what happened and work to make it successful next time. Guard our hearts from getting down and keep our spirits lifted upward. In Jesus Name, Amen.

Great Day!!

Well today was a great day!! Today went really well, and we even got a huge surprise when we were at transfer!!

Here are IM and I before we left for lunch

We went to Jason's Deli for lunch before heading to the clinic. I'm loving spending time with her!

We got to the clinic and were taken back to the room to get ready for transfer. After I changed into the hospital gown, I sat on the bed and we waited for the embryos to thaw. So we chatted a bit more. A few minutes after we arrived back there and the nurse had already come to talk to us about transfer instructions and calendar information, we heard another woman (and her daughter) come in to the bed next to us. There was a curtain between us, but we could hear each other's conversations. The little girl was asking her mom very similar questions to what M asks me, so I was having a giggle and talking to J about it quietly. Then I hear the lady next to us say "Are you a surrogate?" I replied with "Yep, and my IM is right here with me!" Then she asked if I was on a surrogate board, and we discovered that we're actually on the same cycle group on our board together. We didn't know we were transferring in the same place on the same day! Well, we knew the days were the same, but not that we were going to be at the same clinic. So we opened up the curtains and enjoyed the remainder of our transfer day chatting and giggling with her and her daughter. We took pics before we left...

Her daughter jumped in on the next one...

Thank you to everyone who prayed for us and especially those who prayed with me personally last night and today. It means so much!!  

I'll end this post with a prayer as usual. 

Thank you Awesome Heavenly Father for the wonderful day we had today and for the bonding time that J and I had. I pray your hand of protection over the lives you have entrusted me with. Use this time of bed rest to help them burro deep down and settle in to grow big and strong. Keep me ever mindful of the lives I'm caring for and help me to be a good steward of the time we have and of my body. Above all, let me shine the light you would have me to shine to J&J. In your mighty name we pray, Amen.

Tomorrow!!!!

Well, here we are! Tonight is the eve before transfer day!! I'm so excited and giddy! I spoke with IM on the phone tonight and it was hard not to "catch" her enthusiasm as well. 


We have plans to go to lunch around 11:30, then go to the transfer together, and afterward she'll bring me home. Then I get to spend 24 hours being doted on.... okay well, not in this house... at least I get to lay down for 24 hours and pretend like I'm being doted on for most of the time. I know hubby will do his best, though he has to work tomorrow night. But he gets a three day weekend, which I'm very thankful for. 


Today was a day to get ready. I had some heart-work to do today, as well as real-live errands to run and get things done. I also did a little shopping and got some new jammies to wear after transfer, they're super cute! Tonight I had a prayer-partner I used to pray with at church pray with me, and now I'm listening to some worship music. Before I go to sleep I'm going to pray up and read my Bible for a bit. I really want my heart in the same "ready" place that my body is in.


Heavenly Father, only you know what is on my heart today. I pray Father that you would remove those things from me and replace them with peace, so they don't weigh me down tomorrow. I pray Father for your guidance from the moment we get up in the morning, until we lay down to sleep again tomorrow night. Father keep J&J in your perfect peace and calm the anxieties they are feeling, yet keep a live the excitement they feel- it's so contagious! Guard our hearts and minds and take captive things we don't need to be thinking about and fill us with your love and grace. I pray once again that you would guide the doctor's hands as he places the embryos on the lining where they will sink in for the next coming months. I pray for lining that is fluffy and perfect for those embryos and that they would stick right where they need to be. Lord, I have faith that you have ordained this and are making everything happen in your own way. I put my trust and faith in you for a wonderful transfer tomorrow, a successful cycle, and ultimately a healthy pregnancy and one or possibly two babies for J&J. I love you so much God, and thank you for your absolute grace in my life to bring me to this place. It's in your son's name I believe and pray, Amen.

What an update!

So my bloodwork on Friday went okay, my Estrogen was a bit lower than they wanted (276 instead of 500). The clinic called me in the afternoon and increased my estrogen injection to .6ml instead of the .4 I took on Tuesday. I kind of got panicky, and asked around what I could do on my own to increase the estrogen levels in my body naturally.

I was told to decrease my caffeine and drink plenty of water. Isn't that what they tell everyone? I didn't know if it would work, but I did it. I suffered all weekend without the caffeine, oh my head just HURT.

But it paid off!

This morning I went for blood work and a baseline ultrasound. During my "date with the wand" I learned that they wanted my lining at 9mm at the very least. Seconds later, I was told I have a thick lining of 13mm!! Excellent news! I still don't know what the levels of estrogen were, but since I didn't receive a call telling me to increase the estrogen, I'm stuck at .6ml til transfer next week.

On to the better news!
Since everything looked great today, they decided to move up our transfer day by one day. Transfer is now set for Wednesday the 20th at 1pm! As soon as I got out of the appointment, I called J and she was so excited!! The plan is that she's going to pick me up for lunch on Wednesday and then we'll go together to the clinic at 1 and she'll bring me home.

We're both excited! I love hearing the excitement in her voice and we are praying every time we think about it that this all goes as smoothly as possible and that those little embies will stick, stick, stick!!!

Please join us in praying for that, as well as for IM. She heads out of the country again for the weekend and will return on Tuesday, in time for transfer. We're obviously praying for safety, but I think I'm going to add in there some peace, as I know she has to be nervous as well.

Father I know that you have a plan and a purpose in the new friendship we have with J&J. We know that the embryos they created have a purpose in this world as well. Thank you for giving us the opportunity to help J&J bring them into the world. We pray for your peace as we wait out this next few weeks, and we pray for your hands to guide the doctor, give him a steady hand to put them in exactly the right place so that they have the best chance for success. Please keep J safe this weekend as she travels, and bring her home in perfect peace on Tuesday. Make my time with her on Wednesday fruitful, that she would see Jesus in me, and see you at work in her life.


 I thank you that I'm able to put my hope and full trust in you for all of these things. It's in Jesus Name that we ask these things, Amen!