Sunday, June 19, 2011

To the Glory of the Father....

This song has absolutely nothing to do with surrogacy really, but for me the chorus really just sums up so much. I heard it for the first time today, and I fell in love with it.

Do Everything
by Steven Curtis Chapman


You’re picking up toys on the living room floor
for the 15th time today
Matching up socks and sweeping up lost
Cheerios that got away
You put a baby on your hip and color on your lips
and head out the door
And while I may not know you I bet I know you
Wonder sometimes does it matter at all
We’ll let me remind you it all matters just as long as you

Do everything you do to the glory of the One who made you
Cause He made you to do
Every little thing that you do to bring a smile to His face
And tell the story of grace
With every move that you make
And every little thing you do

OOoh ooooh oooooh

Maybe you’re that guy with the suit and tie
Maybe your shirt says your name
You may be hooking up mergers, cooking up burgers
But at the end of the day

Little stuff big stuff in between stuff
God sees it all the same
And while I may not know you I bet I know you
Wonder sometimes does it matter at all
We’ll let me remind you it all matters just as long as you do

Everything you do to the glory of the One who made you
Cause He made you
To do every little thing that you do to bring a smile to His face
And tell the story of grace with every move that you make
And every little thing that you do

Well maybe you’re sitting in math class
Maybe anekatips on a mission in the Congo
Maybe you’re working at the office
Singing along with the radio
Maybe you’re dining at a five star
Or feeding orphans in Myanmar
Anywhere and everywhere you are
Whatever you do it all matters
So do what you do and don’t ever forget
to do

Everything you do to the glory of the One who made you
Cause He made you to do
Every little thing that you do to bring a smile to His face
And tell the story of grace as you do
Everything you do to the glory of the One who made you
Cause He made you to do
Every little thing that you do to bring a smile to His face
And tell the story of grace with every move that you make
And every little thing that you do

Ooh oooooh
Every little thing you d

Thanks to for the lyrics.

This song really for me just helps me remember to do everything for His glory and not my own, and reminds me that even when I think what I'm doing doesn't matter, or I'm not good enough at something... I, and what I do, matter, and bring a smile to God's face.

Anyway, just thought I'd share that. Everything I do ultimately I want to be for His glory. Including this surrogacy. <3 Hope you are having a great weekend!

Friday, June 17, 2011

It's beginning to look a lot like....

That's the lyric going through my head today, but it's not beginning to look like Christmas anywhere around here, especially not in the 100* days of Texas! But things are starting to look a lot like pregnancy! That's because it is, right?

My beta on Wednesday was 401, which means we doubled the numbers almost exactly! Leave it to my body to be textbook this one time. So officially, tomorrow morning I will be 5 weeks pregnant. Due date, according to the IVF calculator, puts us at around February 17, but we will have a different due date from every doctor and sonographer we see from here on out since they all "measure" it differently. So let's just say ohhh... Mid February.

When I blogged last, on Tuesday, I mentioned a few symptoms I'd had already. We can now add this to that list: Nausea. Today while I was out and about with my kids I had a huge wave of nausea come over me and we had to come home for a bit because I was not ready for it. I also could NOT for the life of me figure out what I wanted to eat for lunch, so when I chose something my kids like and ate it, my body pretty much said no way, and I couldn't even finish a kid's meal.

Later, I texted IM and let her know I was feeling very pregnant today. I was pleased to get back the response of "Do tell!" I responded back with what I felt, and hopefully conveyed at least some humor about it, because I don't at all want anyone to feel like I'm complaining. I know some people are thinking, "You signed up for it!" Yes, I did sign up for it, and I'm even happy about feeling it, because it means I'm helping God give my IPs the best gift they could ask for. So I am trying to convey that the best way I can while at the same time reminding myself that I'm allowed a little bit of "yuck," too, because that just comes with pregnancy.

So... YAY for feeling pregnant!

Up next: We're now ready to schedule the ultrasound (sonogram, whichever you want to call it) for July 7th so we can get a good look at the baby(ies) that are baking for the next 35 weeks or so! I'm thinking that this two weeks better hurry up, I can't wait to see!

This was a really great week and I'm so happy for my IPs! I'm also really impressed by the RE that we worked with. This is THREE out of THREE for my IPs. That's a REALLY great record! Hoping the next two weeks flies by and Summer is kind to me! Have a great weekend!

God you are awesome and I'm so blessed that I get to be involved in this amazing process of bringing the child(ren?) you created for I & J in to the world. Thank you for the little signs of pregnancy that have come already that make us excited to be "here." And thank you in advance for all the wonders that this pregnancy will bring us! I ask that you would show us a new joy in this journey every day, and that you would help me to be a light to others for you, in all I do. Show me the best way I can help I & J experience this pregnancy, to be sensitive in the words I use both here on the blog and in conversations, and to be a blessing to them in so many more ways than this. Bless the baby(ies) I'm carrying with good health, keep it/them growing strong, and keep it/them safe and tucked away until your time is perfect for it/them to join their family! It's all in your name I pray, Amen.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011


I forgot to blog between last week's positive pregnancy test, and beta, didn't I? I'm sorry! School's out for summer break and boy is my family trying to keep me busy! Between play dates, church, birthday parties, and family time, at the end of the day: I sleep well.

I will tell you this... the pregnancy test taken last Tuesday morning was the first of thirteen... yes, THIRTEEN. I became quite addicted to seeing that positive test line! At first, I took tests every few hours to see if the test got darker. When it did get a little darker, I decided one a day was fine. I took an Equate test on Friday morning and that was going to be my last one. Then Friday evening, I was backing out of my driveway and hit another car. It completely freaked me out, so to reassure myself that everything was okay, I took another test that night and the next morning. It felt reassuring. Then Saturday, while leaving a pool party/birthday party, my younger son, who doesn't know how to swim, fell into the water (completely dressed, no floaties on) and I had to jump in after him. Yes, I freaked out again. And yes, I took another test. My husband must think I'm nuts, and maybe so do you. I just know that some how, seeing that line helped me not freak out quite as badly. Also, it made me get more excited every time I saw it!

Beta was Monday morning, and I had lots of other surros and friend's cheering me on. We all knew I was pregnant, just didn't know how pregnant ;) A beta number over 5 is considered "pregnant." At 11 days past a 5 day transfer (11dp5dt) I was looking to see if my beta was at the very least a 50. After a nail-biting 7 hours, they FINALLY called with the results. 199! Definitely pregnant, and a good strong number.

Tomorrow is my repeat beta, and we're praying for the numbers to have at least doubled.

As far as symptoms go, really the only thing I can say that is pregnancy related is being extremely tired and not craving caffeine at all; though I have wanted more fruits than usual but that may be attributed to the fact that it's Summer! The other symptoms I can pinpoint to the medicines- bloated, gassy (TMI, right?) and very sore spots where I do my progesterone injections.

So aside from side effects, car wrecks, near drownings, and anything else, I AM really excited to be pregnant and so glad to be on this journey with I & J. I can't wait to see what the next 36 weeks brings!

Lord, thank you SO much for bringing us here, for giving the doctors the skill to help I & J for this third time in a row! I am so glad to be a part of the plan you have for I & J's family and for their little one(s) who is/are growing inside me as I type. Keep watch over it/them and me and keep us healthy and safe. I know you already know the results of tomorrows beta, and I put my hope in you- not in the numbers... even though I know you know how much we want to see a much higher number tomorrow. Take away any anxiety we have currently, and turn it into joy and excitement for the things that are to come. You are doing a great thing, and we are so thankful for it. And last but not least, help me Father to keep this something that in my heart truly is for you and for your glory, and not my own. It's all in your name, Amen.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011


So I have been having an awesome week so far! Sunday we kind of just chilled out, I still didn't want to overdo it. Sunday night I was feeling a little down because everything I was feeling could be explained by either the meds side effects or the coming of AF. I also had a tiny bit of cramping, not bad or painful, but it only lasted about 30 minutes or so. I chalked it up to gas and went to bed early. Monday was a great day, I went to my oldest's last day of school and helped the teachers have a great luncheon to end their year (and took home a ton of yummy leftovers).

I have a bunch of friends, who shall remain nameless, who are POAS pushers. They kept tempting me to take a test. I was determined to hold out til Tuesday. DETERMINED. And I think I ticked them off. Anyway, Monday night I was hanging out with DH here at the house and realized the last time I'd had any substantial caffeine was Friday. I did have a few sips here and there on Saturday and Sunday, but not enough to really matter. And I didn't have a headache. DH and I both knew then, I think.

All night long, I dreamed about taking a home pregnancy test. Seriously, all. night. long. They were all positives.

After taking DH to the train, I came home and ran to the bathroom to take a test. Even though DH was saying to wait til Wednesday so I wasn't disappointed. But after my dreams all night, how could I NOT?!

Yep, we did it!! The first tests I took (yes, I took two so I could know that one was not wrong) were faint, but definite positives. Here is a pic of the first one, on the top is the original image and on the bottom is a contrast enhanced image of the same test.

I immediately texted IM and let her know. She called me back a little bit later (I think both of us needed to compose ourselves, I was in tears) and was so happy!! I cried some more on the phone with her, too. I'm so excited to go on this journey, and it couldn't be with a better couple! I let her tell IF before I announced it on my Facebook, but immediately the congrats came pouring in. I'm so overwhelmed with joy that we did it, and gratefulness for all of the amazing support I know I have in my current friends, past friends, family, and fellow surrogates.

I am so excited and can't wait to see what the journey holds. 

Beta (blood test) is on Monday! Maybe I'll take guesses for beta #s later this week. You KNOW I'll be testing more to see the line get darker, and will probably take a digital test on Friday, but I'll post them when I can. 

Thank you for following what is sure to be an amazing journey and for praying for us! 

Father God you are amazing and I love you so much. Thank you for setting me on this path and finding just the right couple for me to help. I continue to ask your blessing on IM & IF as well as the two embryos we put in last week. Father may they have every thing they need to grow strong and healthy in there. Keep them and I as healthy as can be, and hold us in your hands each day. We lift YOU up and give YOU the praise for this because it would not have come about without your mighty hand preparing the way. You are wonderful God, and your grace is amazing. I love you and praise you for all you are doing and are going to do, thank you. In Jesus Name, always, Amen

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Home again

I'm back home again!

This weekend was awesome, and I really did have a great time getting to know I, J, and their family! I got a lot of time to rest and settle these babies in, and Friday night IM and I had planned to watch a movie and eat popcorn and hang out... we never even started the movie! We stayed up and talked til around 1am! We got up yesterday morning and boy was I glad to be able to get up and move around (and shower!). We went to their son's baseball game and then to lunch with their family and then for a decent but HOT walk at an outlet mall and then back to their house to hang out for the afternoon.

They took great care of me and I was sad the weekend was over yesterday! So sad, in fact, that we decided I wanted to stay a few hours longer. I was supposed to come home on a flight at 4:25, but we called and changed it to the 8:20 flight. We hung out the rest of the afternoon taking it easy and just talking some more. As I was getting ready to get my stuff in the car, the airline called and said the flight had been delayed an hour and a half. (remember last flight home had been delayed and then canceled?!) So we stuck around their house for another hour instead of taking me to the airport just yet and joked about how they (the city) was holding me hostage. I guess they like me so much they don't want me to leave! Anyway, I finally did have to go to the airport and was able to fly out last night. I got home around 12:30 and pretty much just went to sleep.

Happy to be home with my family, but I miss my IPs and their family too! They made me feel very at home.

We are still very confident that this cycle worked and are still praying the babies dig in and make their home sweet home nice and comfortable.  Thanks for your thoughts and prayers to everyone who is reading and praying along with us. It really does mean a lot!

Father thank you for such an awesome weekend and for matching me with an amazing couple. I know you're doing amazing things already and I thank you for those things. Bless the embryos inside, help them to grow and make their home there. And keep us in perfect peace as we wait out the next week or so to see if they stuck around. I trust in your Holy Word that you have blessed me and called me for such a time as this and I ask that you would help me control any thoughts to the contrary. Thank you for the confidence we have in you. Help me to continue to be a light for you to others who are in this journey with me as well as those who are watching it from afar. Thank you again for the calling you have placed in me to do this. It's only for you, Amen!

Friday, June 3, 2011

Transfer day!

Last night I hopped on a plane and came out to where my IPs live for transfer day today. Everything getting on the flight was awesome, until we got to just east of the area we were landing in and there was a storm. A nice bright lightning storm was going on just to the north of us as we descended for landing. Kind of scary but far enough away from us that I wasn't worried. Just very bumpy going in.

We went to eat a late dinner and came home and I got settled in and slept peacefully all night. And we made it to transfer on time! Unfortunately, due to some extenuating circumstances at work, IM was unable to stay with me during transfer. I felt so bad for her! But her aunt was able to stay with me and I got to get to know her and enjoyed chatting while we waited.

Something interesting happened this morning and I really feel like I need to share it here before I tell you about transfer.

I have been determined lately to stay in God's Word and keep my spiritual life strong going into and through this journey. So I've been doing a lot more Bible reading and praying and a lot of working on my heart. So this morning, we were in a rush and I couldn't do a devotion on my computer before I left. While we (IM's aunt and I) were waiting, I got my phone out and went to my "You Version" app (the Bible app) and went to their devotion programs. I chose one that said a 21-day Women's Devotional, and started at day 1. The verses that it took me to were Luke 1:26-45 when the angel came to Mary and told her she would become pregnant, and when Elizabeth who was barren was pregnant with John. The verse that jumped out at me, other than the topic being impeccable timing, was verse 45 "Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her!" 

Anyway,  God is good and He shows His will in our lives in so many ways. As a friend on Facebook put it today, "He still speaks!" and I totally believe it.

Transfer went well, two great embryos were transfered, and as the doctor said, "They flew right in to right where they needed to go!" Then I laid on an incline for 20 minutes, grabbed breakfast, and came back to IPs house to sleep the day away.

So yay! Transfer went great, and I'm enjoying getting to know IPs and their two little boys. Tonight, obviously, we're praying those embies stick, stick, stick!! Pray with me?

Father God thank you so much for the awesome Word in Luke, and for showing it to me. I definitely believe you do what you say you are going to do and I know you have blessed my life beyond anything I could dream up already. Bless the little embryos that were placed inside today, grow them and form them and help them find the right place to burrow in for the next 38 weeks or so. I pray for the rest of this trip to go smoothly, for more awesome time with I & J, and for safe travel home. I know you are working in not only my body but in my heart, and I thank you for that. It's in Your Son's Name I come to you and pray, Amen

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Getting ready to go!

At the moment, I'm getting ready to go and getting packed up to go see my IPs and have our transfer in the morning! I'll be taking my computer along and hopefully be posting from there as soon as I can get hooked up :)

I'm taking cake balls with me as a treat for their family, too!

Please pray for the travel to go smoothly, for the transfer to be successful, and for my bed rest time to be restful and plenty of time for the embryo(s) to burro in!! We appreciate your prayers!!

I'll up date soon!

Father God, you know the plan you have for all of us, for me as a surrogate, for I&J's family, and for the two embryos we will transfer tomorrow. Build the embryos up in thaw that they would be ready and able to settle in for the next 9 months. Thank you for the opportunity to do this for their family, I can't wait to get to know them over the weekend! Thank you for all the friends praying for us and for the confidence we have in you. It's in your name only, Amen!